It is time for Bitch-Space.
I just wrote some 650 words for WiW and… it wasn’t smooth as butter and I’m not sure if I like them (what’s new), just as I’m not incredibly happy about not hitting 1k words within the hour I set for myself. But still… I feel like I made progress and had a few worldbuilding sparks, which will offset the East Asian edge of the world (faces carved in the side of the mountain that watches over the other mountain. I feel like there’s another very famous literary mountain that performs the same function as mine but I can’t quite place it… I have a feeling it’s something like Lord of the Rings. Anyways… on with the bitching).
Did I feel this way (kinda like teeth-pulling) while I wrote D&B? I think I did, although there were more action scenes in D&B, which I’m better at and don’t make me feel like such a dunce. This particular scene was all description and discovery.
I tell you what, writing a character who doesn’t know shit and doesn’t want shit is a shit. I’m trying to do the instinctual pull here (while also worldbuilding) and… I don’t know. I’m beset by doubts on all sides.
I have to get rid of the inner bitch, it’s only holding me back.
I ALSO have to stop trying to do EVERY FUCKING THING! My (day job) boss made a fabulous comment the other day about me stretching myself to do even more shit, such as Furious Fiction (which launches it’s May prompt in 20 minutes). I have to stop doing this to myself (the overloading), so I’ve gone through my May to do list and chopped shit including: four writing tasks/projects (Furious Fiction is one of them, more on that below), four newsletter tasks, a marketing task and some business admin goals (which can be pushed back until June). I then went and highlighted my priorities, which is pretty much writing WiW and getting Short Bits Collected Edition ready to go out to backers.
It’s just that there’s so much to do, and the only person who’s going to do it is me. How the fuck am I supposed to get all this shit done?
I’m pretty sure I’m not meant to get it done, instead I do the best I can and keep going.
*sigh*
I hate that.
Anyways, I’ve slimmed my to do list and now I have to careful about not adding this back onto the list. That is so very easy to do. I thought I was getting better at it, after the March to do list purge (where I reduced my monthly to dos to 4 items, go me) but clearly there’s still work to do done.
Now, about Furious Fiction… I still want to do the flash shit, in particular the FF challenge to help me stomp the bitch. I have a feeling (and it’s probably just my prejudice, but whatever) that FF is more for the literary set than the genre set, which is pretty fucking perfect. My aim with FF is to write and submit a piece each month, throwing my bitch onto the rejection pile over and over in an attempt to tell her to fuck off. PLUS I’m going to be genre as fuck, training the “write what you love and everyone else can fuck off” mentality, as like a double-barrelled screw you to the bitch.
That’s my plan.
BUT… I also don’t want to overcommit myself so… I can only do the challenge if I write WiW first. That way I won’t feel like I’m leaving my primary WIP in the cold/neglecting it while pursing something else. It helps that FF is time limited. Having to write and submit before the end of the weekend is going to help with all that.
And that’s all the bitching I have for today.
I have ten minutes until FF announces their prompt, just enough to post this.